These past 36 hours have been one of the
scariest/peaceful/frustrating/helpless times I have experienced.
As most of you reading this know on Tuesday morning around 4
a.m. the girls woke up for some strange reason. Nick got up with them and then
I heard more crying so I got up to see what was happening. When I got up Nick asked me if I could unplug
the refrigerator because it was making a funny noise. I was exhausted and without really thinking
reached and started pulling out the plug and the electricity caught me. I couldn’t let go and for about 5 seconds
held onto the plug and finally I was released. I remember thinking very
clearly, “don’t fall, sit down slowly” but I was shaking so badly. I ended up on my knees unable to speak. Nick ran in with Hannah to see what was wrong
and saw me on my knees. He kept asking
me what was going on and I couldn’t get anything out. My words were right there but unable to come
out coherently. I was so confused with
what was happening. I finally was able
to get something out about electricity and Nicks face went white. Hannah ran into our room and I wanted to say
I was okay but nothing else would come out except mumbling. I knew nick was afraid it wasn’t just my
speech but my whole mental state so he started giving me tests. I could
remember everything but my speech was another thing. I remember Hannah running back into the
kitchen and so calmly saying “mom I just went and prayed for you and you will
be okay”. That settled me down enough to
motion to Nick that I wanted to go to bed.
I felt I would be fine in the morning.
When I got up the next morning I tried to say something and only
gibberish came out. I remember not
feeling fearful but just feeling so frustrated with what was going on. Around 8 nick found a doctor on the base from
America and had him come in and check me.
All my vitals were fine I just couldn’t talk. The doctors wife went from home to home and
to all the classrooms telling everyone what happened and asking for
prayer. From about 8:15 on we had
people coming to our door praying for me. I was overwhelmed with the response
of our YWAM community as well as others around Arusha calling and reaching out
to us. We honestly did not have more
than 30 minutes where someone did not come by to see what they could do or to
pray for me. It was a little awkward
when they would come and not really understand I couldn’t talk and keep asking
me questions or if they thought I couldn’t understand them so they would talk
to me very slowlyJ
Two friends came over and cleaned our house and took care of the girls so they
could get out and not be in the middle of the situation.
Nick posted on facebook and the amount of support we
received through emails, messages, and posts on our wall was unbelievable. It made me break down in tears knowing
everyone was praying for our family and for complete healing. I don’t know why but in the midst of all of
this it didn’t really occur to me to be afraid.
I took the time to rest and heal because I knew my brain needed it. I continued to look online at peoples
comments and continued to feel assured in the peace and joy I was feeling even
in the midst of the pain in my head and arm and the frustration of not being
able to speak. A couple times I started
talking like normal but after about a minute it went away. I laid in bed and just thanked Jesus over and
over that nothing more happened. I had no burn mark, my arm hurt but I knew
nothing internally was wrong and I knew for sure I would get my speech
back. On Wednesday morning I woke up
and said something to Hannah. She
freaked out and got soo excited but a minute later she brought someone into the
room and I couldn’t speak again. The disappointment in her face broke my heart
but then she said, “oh it’s fine mom, you will talk very very soon” and
left. I rested the rest of the day and
when I woke up again I was able to speak.
Hannah made me write down on a little piece of paper “I can talk now”
and she started walking out of the room with the piece of paper and ran back
and said “mom you need to write on here, “from now on” so it doesn’t go away
again”. I did as she said and she ran
out of our house and shouted to everyone that I was better and I could speak
again! She kept saying “jesus healed my mommy like He said he would!!”. All night she continued to look at me and
say, “talk mom” and I would say something and she would smile and say “God is
soo good to us huh”. I was blown away by
her attitude towards all of this. That
night despite my headache I went to the dinner at the base. I came in and the response of the people
towards me made me so overwhelmed with emotion that I had to go outside the
dining hall and have a good cry (the first since this had happened). I felt so loved. Living here has been hard because we had to
leave family and friends when we moved here.
I have felt loved and appreciated here but something changed that night. I felt that I was truly part of a loving
family and I couldn’t be more thankful to be a part of it. I got home and continued to receive responses
from some of you over the internet and rejoicing together with us in my
complete healing! I cannot begin to
thank you for all of your encouragement and
your love through this. For those of you
who know me well I am someone that freaks out in circumstances like this but I
felt that peace that passes all understanding.
I could continue to rejoice in the fact that God is good, even when I
couldn’t say it out loud. I didn’t
understand the depths of what could have happen until the situation was
over. I will say I still need to get
past the fear of the electric outlets in our house and walking into our kitchen
but that fear will pass. My head is
slowly feeling better as well as my arm and I know very soon I will forget
about what happened and how I felt not
being able to speak but I hope I never forget the feeling I know that was only
from the Lord. The feeling of peace and the knowledge that I can’t change the
situation but I can choose the way I react to it. I can choose to give it to Jesus and trust in
His goodness and relax as I watch the Lord move through a situation. God is good and I am so thankful I can continue
to proclaim that and I won’t stay silent!
